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True Talk: The dilenma of single Lagos babes

True Talk this week is not just for all the single Lagos babes but for all who may at some point have a reason to interact with these women. It is an issue which we have up for discussion, trying to shed clarity on the confusion faced by the single ladies.

Being single in Lagos is just wrong a terminal disease, especially if you are 30 and older. You think that marginalisation is limited to tribe and race? Then you haven’t been faced with the singles dilenma. The dilenma where you are judged and undervalued.

If you are financially stable as a result of being a hardworking career woman, the society will conclude that the reason for your wealth is because you are loose and as such, you cannot get a man to marry you. If you are self employed, then it becomes that you have the job as a cover up as one maga some where is picking your bills. Married men who find you attractive begin to preach the selfish message of lust, telling you that the single men your age are not worth your class. Your parents are likely to seek for help from deliverance houses because, you must have a spiritual husband deterring you from marriage. Your married friends begin to avoid you for fear that you may desperately try to take their husbands.

With all this drama, you begin to question your morales and begin to fear that you might even die of depression caused as a result of loneliness- loneliness since you have no man. But then, should that be a reason to get married? Should ladies rush into marriage with just about any man simply because everyone wants me married. Shouldn’t ladies die as single happy women rather than an unhappy battered married woman?

My advice:

Whenever you feel the pressure, remind yourself that you are better than some others in at least one way- being alive. Relax and enjoy that you are single cos marriage should be a lifelong decision that should be enjoyed and not endured.

What is your advise for the single ladies?

Featured image via 4lah

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